Reality

I have to face the realization that neither I, nor the oasis, is a forever thing. I'm just hoping to keep the oasis going for the rest of my life. For a time, I had hoped Lee would be passionate about keeping it going, but it's not his passion. Without having a passion for it, it's just a sentence to slavery. His happiness is more important to me. And like I've said many times, the oasis never should have been built in a nearly inaccessible location that had no water source other than unreliable monsoons. 

So, in a manner, I'm mourning its demise. It reminds me of when my mother was terminally ill. I moved in with her and kept her alive for another year. During that year, I did my mourning, and when she died, I didn't grieve. Now I feel like I'm watching the oasis in its decline toward death, and the grieving feels similar, as does my fight to keep it alive. The secret is to keep it alive as best I can, while accepting that it's temporary. 

Yesterday, I went down and serviced feeders. Also got Lee to put some concrete patches on a couple of bad spots going up the big hill.

Today, I'm back in town. He's completing the list of chores I left him with. Here he's leveling the drip reservoir after the devastating monsoon of July 3rd caused parts of it to sink into the saturated ground.

In a couple of days he's heading back to Colorado for a month or two. It puts him nearer to his daughters there, and his wife (an only child) is nearer to her parents. Music is his passion, and he can do it anywhere. He plans to spend this winter at the oasis. I sure hope he does.

Meanwhile, I'm waiting to hear back from the road contractor who I'm hoping will fix the road. It has to get done before the hummimgbird festival in less than a month. That's my priority at the moment. And practicing gratitude! I have so much to be grateful for!